Real Women Are Not Delusional

"Dear God, Please give me a husband who looks like Colin Firth as Mr. Darcy and have him propose to me by the Lake of Shining Waters."

This week I've been thinking a lot about how, as young women, we should commit to praying for the young men of today.  We should pray for our friends, boyfriends, husbands or future husbands.  While reading on this topic, I found a horrible "Single Girl's Prayer" online (on a legitmate Christian website), which I feel is merely evidence of a delusional fairy tail epidemic.  It's sometimes as if girls have no standards at all, or they have highly unrealistic princess expectations.  Finding that balance is difficult, and I can admit I've definitely struggled with it.  So what expectations should we have and should we not have for guys?

A Single Girl's Prayer Delusion

"Now I lay me down to sleep,
I pray for a man who's not a creep.

One who's handsome, smart and strong,
Who's not afraid to admit when he is wrong."

"God please bring me the perfect husband who has Brad Pitt's looks, Billy Ray Cyrus's voice...and who loves my awesome mullet."Ok, so that's nice. Obviously, you don't want to marry a creep... really high standards there.  Also, perhaps praying for guys who are struggling with sin is a little more compassionate.  Being handsome, smart, strong, and humble are definitely positives, but let's cut the rhyming game and pray for men to be honorable leaders, to have attractive hearts and encouraging spirits. 

"One who thinks before he speaks.
When he promises to call, he doesn't wait six weeks.

I pray that he is gainfully employed,
Won't lose his cool when he's annoyed."

"Please send a husband who will help me knit mittens for my 13 kittens and who loves Christmas caroling as much as I do!"Again, I'm fine with this prayer so far.  But be sure you also are praying this for yourself!  Pray to not speak to guys out of hightened emotion.  Pray that you will also be employed and not lose your cool.  Pray that communication lines will always be open, because annoying situations just happen!

"Pulls out my chair and opens my door,
Massages my back and begs to do more.

...and knows what to say when I ask "How fat is my behind?"

"Please send a guy who will tell me that I'm skinny and pretty everyday."Ok, here is where we stop, or where I believe this "prayer" must be satirical.  Sure, let's pray for the young men of today to respect young women and to display that by keeping chivalry alive.  But are we seriously praying for a husband or slave?  Acts of love and kindness are a bonus and result of true love, not some service that you demand.  And I would NEVER pray for someone to lie about my fat behind!  A healthy iron-sharpens-iron relationship will always be honest and speak the truth in love.  I would rather have someone to encourage me to be more healthy rather than lying about an issue.  And that encouragement should go both directions.  Also, if a guy likes you, he probably is okay with how you look.  We need to stop searching for approval all the time and have a little confidence.

"...He brings ME a sandwich too, when he goes to the kitchen.

I pray that this man will love me to no end,
And never compare me to my best friend."

"Send anyone of the male species who is okay naming our 4 children, Harry, Hermione, Minerva and Millicent."Ugh.  Yes, a caring guy will make you a sandwich.  But these are just the benefits of finding a guy who is mature and loving.  Many people are "nice," and too many girls just want to date any guy who gives them some attention.  Pray instead for a man who has the same passion for life that you do, who makes you a better person and encourages your soul.  And didn't we already cover the fact that you don't want a creep? Who on earth would compare you to your best friend?!

"Thank you in advance and now I'll just wait,
For I know you will send him before it's too late. Amen."

"Your sending someone before I'm 28, right? RIGHT?!"No.  I hate how passive this sounds.  Let's change this to "in this time before meeting him, help me to grow and mature into the strong companion I am supposed to be.  May I fulfill my passions and make this world a better place even if I am alone.  You are always with me." 

We need to pray for men to be exemplary leaders, and not become accustomed to the media portrayal of men as stupid, bumbling idiots who might get a slight clue, fall in love with us, and treat us like queens of the world.  Encourage the guys around you by being a light and a caring daughter of Christ... That's a realistic princess.

Comments

[Robert G Cleveland]

You display much wisdom, young lady.